Throughout the history of humankind, our species has always found something to celebrate. Religious celebrations, anniversaries, national or global festivals and many more.

Why are we doing this? I am sure there are many psychological and sociological reasons, but the quintessential need is to have a PAUSE, a moment to shake us up and remind us of the important aspects of our existence. It is also a moment to share and CARE as a community, family, citizen of the world, and an important opportunity to think beyond ourselves.

Well, let’s all remember this aspect of celebrations as we wish the best for the upcoming festivities – whatever they might be. And in particular, let’s hope that the NEW YEAR 2020 will bring happiness, health and prosperity to each of us, our communities and the world.

Happy holidays!

This week, my wife and I sent our twin sons to university.

Since they are twins, they chose to study at different schools. One went to the West coast and the other to the East coast of the USA. The distance between is 6 hours by plane. So here is another test to pass for the parents. If learning never ends, then this step is one that brings along new feelings. And of course, it is the hardest for the mothers. But I see that this new beginning is one of the most important steps for young people as they become mature. So far, we always stood next to them and held their hands, and now we will keep holding them from the distance.

Learning never ends!

In my postdated 25 July 2014, I had given statistical information on femicides and stated my anger on this issue. Let me remind you my words: “There is not a single week, or even a day, that a woman is not abused and killed in our country. 139 women were killed in the first 6 months of 2014.” (Where are the authorities as women get killed?) Unfortunately, the situation is even worse today. And my sadness grows, as does my anger. We, as a society, have to solve this problem. But how?

As in every problem, the first step to solution is education. I don’t mean formal education. The starting point should be the family training and perception created within the family. Once we consider, evaluate and thus value “boys” differently from “girls”, unfortunately we cause the problem to become deeper and deeper. As parents or adults, we have to teach children that people cannot be treated differently because of their gender or other qualities. If we can succeed in this training within the family and if our children see the same perspective at school, we can overcome this problem. However, this is medium and long-term solution. How about the short-term? Shall we let this go on as it is? Of course not. Here, I would like to reshare my blog post of 25 July:

“I’m angry. There is not a single week, or even a day, that a woman is not abused and killed in our country. 139 women were killed in the first 6 months of 2014.

The number of women killed by men was 18 in June alone.

I’m angry because families, friends, neighbors, in short, the society neither show any interest in this issue nor react to even the slightest suspicion of violence against women. Nowhere in the world can we expect or hope for any government to solve all problems. The solution to such problems should come from us as responsible individuals. Those who do not take action risk ill-treatment to their daughters, sisters, mothers, or spouses as well. There are, of course, more important and urgent issues in our country and in the world, but this is also critical. As members of this society, we act as if we are not responsible for this situation and say, “I have my own problems, what can I do?” Yet this is the problem of all of us. We must act.

It would be horrible for people in our country to get used to this, as if it is normal or not important. Sometimes just a phone call pays off, please let’s be responsible:

183 – (Social Services Hotline for Family, Women, Children, and Disabled)

Domestic Violence Emergency Hotline – 0212 656 96 96”

What else can we do? We can speak up. Let’s support the initiatives on this issue and say it loud on every occasion that every human being has the same right to live. It is the duty of all of us to get erase this shame.

Sunday my sons congratulated me for Father’s Day. For me it was a day to remember my own Father, who passed away on Father’s Day, just 3 years ago. In our family we grew up to remember events and nurture memories. As a Father myself, I try to pass some of those family related memories to my children as well. These memories do not need to be those related to extraordinary achievements. They are more those simple memories about who our ancestors were and how they lived life. We remember them and sometimes we understand who we as individuals are and act in our own life. For this I remember my Father ( not only) on Father’s Day and every year I am surprised to discover how much of him is still in me.

My children complain that the internet connection at home is insufficient. My youngest son even asked me once what we used to do when there was no social media. I told him that we used to play marbles, make toys such as cars, and write letters. In amazement, he said “How come? Did you make your toys yourselves? But that should take a very long time!” The conversation came to the conclusion that it becomes more and more uncommon to produce something with our own hands. That reminds me of an interview with Karl Lagerfeld, one of the most creative fashion designers of our times. I remember having read the interview and discussions in the German newspaper “Die Zeit”. Mr. Lagerfeld explained the subject as follows:

Is there anything that we do with our hands anymore?

Is there anyone who writes letters by hand anymore?

Is there anyone who can knit a sweater anymore?

Is there anyone who can make a kite for his kid anymore?

Instead, we write e-mails on our smartphones that use spelling software to predict what we want to write as we currently write it. All our clumsiness is made up by electronic devices everywhere. Everything that is produced by modern businesspeople can be reproduced, copied, viewed, googled, saved, and printed (3D). People in service-based society are exempt from manual works so as to focus on intellectual ones. Thus, they can have more time for other works.

So now, what will we do with all this time?

When I started my career at Siemens, it was a global company with 129 years of history and operating in more than 100 countries. Back then, not everyone had a phone line like they do now. Phones were only given to employees at specific positions. There was no internet or fax yet and the most common communication tool was Siemens’ T1000 Teleprinters. Yet again, this did not change the fact that Siemens was a vast network operating globally. And I was wondering how this network operated in full harmony. That is how my desire to work abroad emerged. I had an endless curiosity for the “new”, which has always fascinated me, and an appetite for knowledge. My personal trait that kept my life “dynamic” has always been the curiosity for the “new”, in other words the “unknown, unfamiliar.” For instance, today, I find it remarkable how social media changes our lives and social system as a new concept and it will probably affect all future generations. This curiosity for the “new” resulted in me moving from Germany to USA and made this decision the most important turning point in my life.

I must confess that as a man raised within the Turkish and German cultures that approach towards almost everything with suspicion, American lifestyle of welcoming every new idea without any prejudice, simply saying “this is amazing” seemed very “superficial” to me at the beginning. However, then I understood that approaching ideas primarily from the “positive side” is just another perspective. Especially what I, myself, experienced at Silicon Valley was that people were enthusiastic about hearing about and, furthermore, investing in new ideas. This was probably my first contact with the “diversity” phenomenon in a different dimension. I realized that when we, humans, can change and shape a lot more while working in different countries and functions. More importantly, we become more open to developing new perspectives. I can say this has been the most important turning point to shape my career. But, not this alone.

When we moved to India with our 3 kids, both my family and I faced substantial changes in our lives. We had never lived in a society where social discriminations were so sharp and visible. I was concerned that my kids would witness a very poor and inflexible society, which is a direct result of their lifestyle. In fact, I must confess that I even thought about covering car windows with dark-colored curtains so that my kids would not be shocked by the real life in India. Of course, we did not do that, and we allowed our kids to face the society they live in and learn what happens around them. They constantly asked questions to us and we explained everything without changing or hiding a single thing. One year later, it was our kids who explained the situation of the Indian people with empathy and tolerance to our guests at home.

And another surprising thing we learned was that the caste system in India created both the privileged group called the “Untouchables” and also the sense of “philanthropy and tolerance” which is the foundation of the Indian society. When I found out that my chauffeur, whose monthly salary was perhaps 100 dollars only, was taking a huge pot of lentil soup to the poorhouse once a week, he was embarrassed, because he thought such deeds had to be done without anyone knowing. What I realized was that the quantity of contribution doesn’t matter. What matters is this: Individuals within the masses, those who keep the system alive continue to contribute even in a modest and small way. My experiences in India has a special place in my life in many different aspects.

Lastly, I would like to say that being “different” in your environment doesn’t mean you should accept the roles given by the society as they are. In my opinion, this is one of the important turning points in many lives, including mine. My experience goes back to my school years. As my grandfather had emigrated as early as 1924, I knew very well what it was like to live in a foreign society. In the school, maybe I was the kid who is not “German”, but for me this was never a problem because there was an impressive example right before me: A school friend who challenged his physical disabilities and established himself as he is. He not only rejected the roles “given” to him by the society because of his physical condition, but also overcame difficulties by establishing himself “different”. Moreover he “shone” with his differences in his social environment. This has been the most striking example to show me that differences can make people unique and bring them to the fore. When you accept your “different” qualities as they are, you also accept the fact that the this is your chance. Having a friend like him has been a turning point, not only in my professional life, but also in my whole life.